Class01-Importance of Manners

Class 1
‘Importance of Manners’

Manners / Character / Traits of a Muslim

One of the most beautiful things in Islam is the emphasis on good manners. This is something so many Non-Muslims have been attracted to, before eventually accepting Islam. One quote a shaykh once made in a lecture particularly stuck:  A Muslim is made by manners.

The Prophet ﷺ was asked, “What will enter the greatest amount of people into Paradise?” His response was, “Taqwa of Allah and a good attitude.” (Tirmidhi)

This is a beautiful Hadeeth which shows the importance of doing good at everything, having Taqwa of Allah is between the Slave and His Lord but the manners is between people and so along with being a good Aa’bid (worshipper of Allah) being a well-mannered person can get us to Jannah by the Mercy of Allah!

Furthermore there are other ahadeeth emphasizing the importance of Manners & Character, we will list some of them below the Prophet ﷺ said:

  • The only reason I have been sent is to perfect good manners.” [Al-Bukhaari, Ahmad]
  •  There is nothing heavier than good character put in the scale of a believer on the Day of Resurrection.”  (Abu Dawood)
  • “The best among you are those who have the best manners and character.”(Sahih Bukhari)
  • “The dearest to me among you and the nearest to me on the Day of Judgement are those who have the best character.” (Sunan At-Tirmidhee: 2018) 

Even though such great importance and rewards have been mentioned sadly nowadays something strange is going on.

  • Muslims are seen as the untidy ones when its said the Purity is half Imaan.
  • The Islamic schools are becoming known for bad manners— Students, Teacher & Parents all equally blame worthy.
  • It is the Muslim Communities where the neighbors do not help each other when there has been so much emphasis given to it.
  • The Muslim Areas are the dirtiest of all and so landlords (even Muslims) prefer to have Non-Muslims tenants.
  • The Muslim Business Man are trusted the least
  • The Muslim workers are seen as lazy, unreliable and deceiving.
  • Men with beard are seen and referred to as harsh people.
  • The Ummah is sleeping none has the courage to stand up for justice.
  • The Muslims are more into arguing and making their points to win rather than trying to simplifying things and making things easy.
  • It is usually a Muslim trying to pull down another brother when the non-Muslims are supporting each other to grow.

There’s clearly something wrong. Why is there such a massive difference between what Islam teaches us and what is being reflected in society? The answer is: manners.

Seeing the value of Manners and doing things for the Sake of Allah

Stop a moment and comprehend that your manners can be one of the reasons a person accepts Islam and his/her good deeds from there on will all in your accounts as well. Ponder on the fact that Manners will weigh so heavily on the Day of Judgment when every small thing can make a big difference, envision being nearest to the Prophet ﷺ on the Day of Judgment, realize that manners could be one of the main reasons for Allah to enter you into His Gardens of Paradise.

Think that, why are almost all parents so keen on teaching saying please & thank you to their children? Because it is fitrah (natural inclination) for parents to want good manners from their children.

We should speak the truth, be honest, be brave, be just, not just because society considers it good manners; you we should because Allah ‘azza wajal has commanded us to do so! Allah (swt) has told us which manners are good.

So develop your good habits only for the sake of Allah, remembering your relationship with Him and seeking closeness to Him while focusing on your manners, this helps us to do more than we can for any worldly benefits.

The Best Model of Good Character

How do I know what a good character is? Look at the Prophet ﷺ  . He is the perfect example of good character, Allah says about him: “You have indeed in the Messenger of Allah a beautiful pattern (of conduct) for any one whose hope is in Allah and the Final Day, and who engages much in the Praise of Allah”. [Quran, 33:21]

Perfection in All You Do

One of the core problems with the Muslims specially those who are good at some things is that they become complacent. They do some really good things but then fall way behind in other things like a person is really good in Salah, Dawah, etc but his relation with his parents is appalling. This is not a complete Muslim, the main attribute of the Prophet’s character was perfection. He strove for perfection in everything he did. When someone would speak to him, he would turn around fully to talk. When speaking with him, he was never the first to look away, he was the best of companions and similarly was the best to his wives. He was simply perfect in everything he did Alhamdulilah!

Likewise we should try to perfect anything we do and be consistent at it, no matter how small the deed!

In this course we will look at the Traits we see that are missing in us, the Ummah. Their virtues, benefits and the harm of not having them.

  • Sincerity – Doing Things for the Sake of God – Strong Faith and Tawakkul – Fearing God, and Being Mindful of Him
  • Good Morals, Ethics and Companionship
  • Politeness – Good Manners – Kindness –Mercy – Compassion
  • Love for Reformation and Reconciliation
  • Ordering with the Good and Forbidding Evil
  • Love of Purification – Good Appearance –
  • Safeguarding and Minding One’s Language
  • Excelling in Acts of Worship
  • Forbearance
  • Asceticism in Worldly Affairs – Altruism –
  • Simplification and Ease
  • Fearing God, being Mindful to Not Trespass His Limits
  • Spending Generously
  • Cooperation
  • Aggrandizing the limits set by Allah, and Always Seeking the Moderate Path
  • Pleasant Facial Expression
  • Truthfulness – Honesty – Trustworthiness – Reliability – Keeping commitments including punctuality.
  • Bravery and Courage
  • Haya – Gheerah  – Bashfulness
  • Humbleness
  • Patience – Forbearance  
  • Justice –  Fairness
  • Richness and Contentment of the Heart
  • Hoping for Goodness, Even for his Enemies

SubhaanAllah the sad part is that we listing all these as Lost Traits although looking at the list it is almost the full characteristic of good men. Yes it might take a lifetime for us to perfect in all these but a Muslim is he who strives for the Sake of Allah. A Muslim should take action do the best he/she can and pray to Allah.

Even the Prophet ﷺ used to pray for a good attitude, saying, “O Allaah, You have made my outward form beautiful so make my attitude good too.” [Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan in his Saheeh (3/239) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani]. 

He also used to pray by saying, “O Allah guide me to the best character, none can guide me to the best character except you. And divert away from the evil character and none divert it away from me except you”.

To conclude, the importance of Manners and characters cannot be over-emphasized and so we will look into some of the characteristics that we see are missing in the Ummah their virtues and evils on abandoning them.